Last Friday, Alexander discovered something new.
We have installed barrier gates around the house, and regularly keep certain doors closed, to prevent Alex from falling off steps and crawling through doggy doors and splashing in toilets and other things that he'd just love to do if given the chance.
Unfortunately, these measures also mean that our dog Ricki can't get outside on her own anymore.
Can you see where this is going?
I had let Ricki out briefly, not twenty minutes earlier, since she had seemed eager to do her business. But no matter. We were in the back room, on the computer, and Alex was happily playing and crawling between the front and back of the house, all inside the "safe" area where we've removed all potential sources of trouble.
Ricki, I assumed, had just curled up somewhere like she usually does. We didn't hear any whimpering or scratching, which are the usual signs she wants something (like to go out).
Now can you smell where this is going?
At one point, Alex had been out in the dining room for a few minutes. The familiar sounds of him gurgling and banging his toys were absent, which usually means he's found something very interesting and is concentrating on it. I went to check on him just to make sure he was okay.
He was playing in a pile of Ricki's poo.
I'm certain that Ricki was more embarrassed than Alex. Once I opened the door to her room, she sort of slunk into her bed for the rest of the evening. Alex, on the other hand, was having a ball. We would have taken photos but at the time we were too traumatised by the shock, and the smell, of the moment.
Cleaning him up was fun, because he had a fistful of poo in each hand and he didn't want to let go. And when he smiled as if to say "look what I found!" he had little bits of poo on his tongue. His breath smelled bad. Very bad. And even worse, it was time for his evening breastfeed.
I think I've disclosed enough. You can imagine the rest.
Sorry if it was too much information.